A Newburgh firefighter became an ad hoc surgeon Friday, called upon to use a pneumatic saw to cut a piece of steel pipe off a 73-year-old man’s penis.
You’ve got to be asking yourself — as I am — just what the fuck is going on here?
Is it a penis-pump gone awry?
Some sort of lengthening apparatus? Torsion?
Who the fuck knows, but I can only imaging the paperwork after that call:
Hospital staff prepared the man, who was unidentified, by wrapping the skin and sliding a lubricated tongue depressor between the pipe and the man’s penis to protect him. A doctor, nurses and a paramedic gathered in the Emergency Room as a firefighter – “one of the new guys” – prepared to begin the operation.
“Just don’t cut it off,” the senior citizen reportedly said. [Ed.: emphasis mine.]
Apparently Firefighters chose a “wizzer saw” (you can’t make this shit up).
The wizzer saw emptied the first bottle of air and then a second. Finally, after five air bottles, the saw clipped through the final bit of pipe, and they were able to free the man. He was apparently unharmed by the operation, Mandoske said, although the assistant chief didn’t press for details.
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Anrold to Paris Hilton: “I have many more important things to think about.” GO ARNIE!
Anrold to Paris Hilton: “I have many more important things to think about.” GO ARNIE!
Anrold to Paris Hilton: “I have many more important things to think about.” GO ARNIE!
It's a good thing that the man went unharmed. I thought for a second there that his penis will come off.
It's a good thing that the man went unharmed. I thought for a second there that his penis will come off.
It's a good thing that the man went unharmed. I thought for a second there that his penis will come off.
Still don't get it. What did happen
Still don't get it. What did happen
Still don't get it. What did happen
The guy attempted to use a steel pipe as a masturbatory aid and ended up getting his penis stuck inside it.
The guy attempted to use a steel pipe as a masturbatory aid and ended up getting his penis stuck inside it.
The guy attempted to use a steel pipe as a masturbatory aid and ended up getting his penis stuck inside it.
Haha. Weird and funny. Why chose a steel pipe?! Lucky he didn't lose it for good.
Haha. Weird and funny. Why chose a steel pipe?! Lucky he didn't lose it for good.
Haha. Weird and funny. Why chose a steel pipe?! Lucky he didn't lose it for good.
Aparrently the pipe was 1 inch long by 1 inch wide and his penis had turned purple, ouch
There are a lot of crazy men in the world but to do such thing is way crazy.It's good he hadn't had an erectie
There are a lot of crazy men in the world but to do such thing is way crazy.It's good he hadn't had an erectie