So, it turns out MTV is planning on producing a scripted reality-TV show (talk about an oxymoron) about an unpopular High School student with a large penis whose life is turned around (for the better) once everyone finds out.

Jesus Fucking Christ.

Really, MTV?

Way to go in propelling the stereotype that all a man needs to succeed in life is a large penis.

The series is apparently going to be called “The Hard Times of RJ Berger”. Why not simply call it “Size Queen High School Follies”.

MTV is clearly saying to all dorks that the only way you can ever think of getting a girl is to have a monster cock.

This is dangerous, and it’s wrong.

Shame on MTV.

Now, where did I put that Adam Curry blow-up doll?

Some of you are probably a little amazed I haven’t commented on this story earlier. In fact, I haven’t commented a lot on penis size (either yours or mine) in quite some time.

Fear not gentle reader, it’s just that I’ve only been busy.

When I read the news reports about a TSA Supervisor who ridiculed his employee when he found out the man had a small penis I was just as shocked and incensed like most everyone.

Shortly after it happened I even Tweeted, Buzzed, and Tumbl’d that: “can we now assume that any man that refuses to step through them from here on out probably also has a small penis?”

Which puts a lot of men in a precarious spot.

I commented at the time that the full-body scanners were a good thing for the most part, but as the days have gone by and after I’ve talked to several people about this incident, I’m not so sure.

Those of you who know me know if anything I’m pretty self-conscious about the size of my cock, and go to great lengths (no pun intended) sometimes to hide it.

Most of you probably think it’s because I’m somehow ashamed of my penis, but that could be the furthest thing from the truth. The simple fact is I don’t like to draw a lot of attention to myself. Some guys get off and want to show their banana package for all the World to see. They want to be this proud peacock spreading their plumage, strutting around, and be always on display.

That’s just not me.

But then I got to thinking:

How is a transsexual going to be treated when he or she walks through one of those machines?

Here’s someone who goes to great lengths each day to pass as their gender and not their sex. Are they going to be subjected to scorn and ridicule either publicly or privately because as my friend from the UK would say, “the boot doesn’t match the bonnet”?

Would a MtF be subjected to increased attention if the operator discovers breasts, a penis, and testicles?

Would a FtM be subjected to secondary screening because they were “packing” or were wearing an “STP” (stand-to-pee) device?

Would someone like me be called out because with the TSA’s X-Ray machine an 8-9” long flaccid cock looks like hidden contraband in one’s Jockey’s?

In my initial Tumblr post on this subject I humorously commented that if I were called for secondary screening after having just walked through the full-body scanner that I’d consider it sexual harassment if the man feeling me up wasn’t cute, which was in response to the few times I have been selected for a “pat down” I actually have been accidentally groped by TSA.

Now, I don’t think for a moment that they intentionally wanted to touch my penis, but I remember one incident very clearly.

I was flying out of Atlanta to San Juan with my husband for a holiday and stepped through the metal detector which went off. I was called aside for a secondary screening which that day also consisted of a pat-down.

The woman proceeded to run her fingers over my chest, back, under my arms, and up the inside of my legs when she brushed up against my penis. Whether she was curious or surprised because she wasn’t expecting to find a penis half-way down a tall, skinny, white man’s leg I don’t know, but she then grabbed it to feel it.

I was like, “You’re making my husband jealous!” at which point she realized what she was grabbing and got incredibly embarrassed and waved me on by.

Which raises yet another question.

If our TSA agents are going to be embarrassed at touching a man’s junk, or accidentally finding junk where there ought not to be junk, then how effective can they actually be?

I’m reminded by a famous quote by Benjamin Franklin that seems to be cropping up here more and more lately:

“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.”

A Newburgh firefighter became an ad hoc surgeon Friday, called upon to use a pneumatic saw to cut a piece of steel pipe off a 73-year-old man’s penis.

You’ve got to be asking yourself — as I am — just what the fuck is going on here?

Is it a penis-pump gone awry?

Some sort of lengthening apparatus?  Torsion?

Who the fuck knows, but I can only imaging the paperwork after that call:

Apparently Firefighters chose a “wizzer saw” (you can’t make this shit up).

Newburgh firefighter performs delicate operation to save man’s penis – RecordOnline.com – The Times Herald Record